Dear Scott,
I am home! Surprise!
Having nothing for me to do in Iraq after misleading me into going out there, I am now home in DC at my company's Crystal City office where on my first day I'm not sure they know I exist.
This place feels like the Twilight Zone. It's very quiet. A few people have said hello, but I don't think anyone is going to give me any work. I realize now that I could've stayed in Iraq indefinitely and not done anything, but still gotten paid. I think instead that is what will now happen here in DC. I will come into work, do nothing, and be paid. Occasionally I will wander down to the Au Bon Pain in the Crystal City underground and get a latte and perhaps a cinnamon scone. All the weight I lost in Iraq I will quickly regain. This is what I predict.
Anyway, in the interest of getting this posted, that is all for now.
Let's hit the gym!
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
In Which Scott Learns of Surprising News
Dear Blog,
It’s been a long time. I apologize for neglecting you.
Necessity drives this reunion. We find ourselves back in the Kuwait airport, and I am horribly, horribly bored, and more than a little exhausted. Since Wi-Fi costs money, and the only way to purchase it is using a mobile phone that I don’t have, I am typing this in Word for now. Sitting in a Starbucks with an orange juice and some green tea, blogging is the natural thing to do. They Asian fellow across from me has his Mac out, and is typing away while he smokes, but I suspect he has better things to do than write a blog. Actually, I just saw his screen and he appears to be IMing and doing video chat with some friends – real friends, as opposed to my imaginary readers. (I don’t mean to bash my readers, but it’s been so long you may have found something else to do.)
So the Kuwait airport is a shopping mecca, as is the rest of Kuwait. Since the Kuwaiti population doesn’t work – they all have government jobs – they turn to consumption to pass the time. Just today I was almost run down by a Porsche, a Hummer, a Mercedes, and some type of classic car. You see, they also don’t respect traffic laws, or maybe they just don’t have traffic laws. I’m not sure. Anyway, being a pedestrian is dangerous work, and I can’t help but feel poor when I walk around like one of the ex-patriot workers who do all the manual labor here. I don’t think actual Kuwaitis do much walking. A Bahraini girl I met last night described Kuwaitis as “arrogant.”
Today I played the tourist again and went to visit Kuwait’s big observation tower. It’s like the Space Needle, but rounder. I first had lunch on the café level. I was told it rotated, but it didn’t appear to be. In fact, the view was obscured by the filthy windows. To be fair, it’s hard keeping anything clean in this region because of all the dust, but they should allot for that when they construct glass observation towers. Anyway, I was midway through lunch – a disappointing, but not entirely bad pizza, plus a fruit milkshake – when a team of men dangling from ropes suddenly flew over the edge of the window overhang! They looked like ninjas, and they started doing flips and things. I thought it was the window washers, but it turned out to be counter-terrorism police doing a drill. I asked why they would practice jumping off a big tower, but I suppose it’s a target as much as anything. The police seemed to be having fun.
During this show, I met two women of unknown origin. One was Asian, one was black, and both lived in Saudi Arabia, although I feel like the Asian one was from Australia. They’d come to Kuwait on a brief vacation and wanted tourist recommendations. I told them to visit the old souk, where I bought Drew that nice loofah last time, and they thought that was a good idea. Anyway, it’s the only place I know. They mentioned a “VIP” movie theater where the chairs massage you, so that also sounded nice.
I stayed in a very nice Courtyard Marriott. It was nicer than most regular Marriotts in the United States, not that most Marriotts are very nice. I always find their linens abrasive and the furniture cheap. But this one was nice. On the way to the airport tonight my Indian driver told me it was nice because Middle Easterners are rich and demand bellboys and concierges and things. He basically implied that Middle Easterners are spoiled, stuck-up wastes of life, and I’m inclined to agree. I don’t think it’s a healthy culture to grow up in, although of course I’m generalizing. I do enjoy staying in hotels here, though. They always have delicious breakfast buffets with fresh juices and fruit, and an admirable pastry selection. Also, they typically have nice cars to shuttle you to the airport, and tonight was no exception.
As I said, I’m sitting in a Starbucks now. It’s my second of the day. Whereas I was excited to see the first one, I was resigned to sit in this one. I came to the airport early hoping to check in and go hang in the departure lounge (I’ve decided I’m upgrading), but check-in doesn’t begin for another hour and a half. I’ve already consumed so much that I really don’t want anything more, but that’s why I’m sticking to light, hydrating liquids. Across the way, though, I see a Pizza Express, and I really love Pizza Express. It’s a British pizza chain with just delicious food. Megan and I went to one in Holland Park, or at least we tried. It’s also the first restaurant I ate at in Manchester, so many years ago. It has a special place in my heart, so once I ditch my bags tonight I may go eat there just for kicks. The alternative would be to go sunglasses shopping, and I feel pizza would be much cheaper, and about as valuable in the long-run. They do have really nice sunglasses here, though. My current favorite pair came from Kuwait.
There are a number of Americans wandering around. It is comforting that none of them seem to know what is going on either. This airport is chaotic -- lots of languages, unclear procedures, and teams of little Southeast Asian men trying to carry your bags for money. For all that, I am finally comfortable navigating this place.
My last day in Baghdad was pleasant enough. I stayed up late the night before watching the last episode of Rome (what a good show!) and reading the last book of Twilight. Unfortunately, with only about 80 pages left in the book, I decided to ship it home. It was just too big of a volume to justify going in a carry-on. Instead I’m reading Abundance, the story of Marie Antoinette, and I have some magazines. If it gets super dull, I’ll watch some of The Tudors, Season II. Megan will recall we watched The Tudors, Season I, in Argentina. It’s been a long time and I have some catching up to do. The bootleg DVD shops in Baghdad sell all these great shows for so cheap! And we’re allowed to ship them home. I don’t know how the military justifies that, but I’m all for it. Rome was a great show!
So my last day, I very leisurely slept in, did some cleaning, did some packing, got some lunch, picked up laundry, and then ran to the post office with one minute to spare. All my considerable loot from the last month is being shipped back home, except, Mom, for your Tupperware container. I’m afraid that was abandoned. I can buy you a new one if you like. Half my office was out, so goodbyes were brief, but I won’t really miss them. I liked them and all, but I won’t miss them. I think I’m over them already. What a tedious job. It’s a really interesting concept, and valuable I think, but actually doing it from day to day was wearing me out fast. Instead I’m off to the great unknown in the DC headquarters! Business development is probably in my future, and I have very little interest in it. Ivan needs to kick into gear and find me a real job! What a fool I was to leave the Pentagon (again)!
DC will hopefully still be snow-covered when I arrive. Well, undoubtedly it will be snow-covered. I just hope it’s clean snow. I’m already anticipating a difficult time getting home from the airport, by which I mean, I don’t know if cabs are even running, and I have way too much luggage to go hoofing through the snow. I also have a flight to Boston booked for some time tomorrow out of BWI. Chances of that happening: slim to none. My reason was to surprise my friends at their Vermont ski trip, but now it sounds like most aren’t going to Vermont because they’re trapped in DC, just like I will be. Best $315 I ever spent. See, I bought TWO tickets to Boston. The first was a great deal -- $200 roundtrip – but I figured out only seconds after I clicked purchase that my return flight was for March 15, not February 15. So then I bought a one-way ticket for Feb. 15 so I could come home to DC. And now it appears I won’t even be going up there. Had I anticipated all this, I would’ve probably stayed in Baghdad another few days and made extra money instead of spending it on wasted airline tickets out of Baltimore.
I can’t stress enough how happy I am to leave that team in Baghdad. “What a bunch of whiners!” I whine to you, loyal readers. That Luis has a bad attitude and is a sub-standard manager, not that he had a great team to work with: smart people, but questionable work ethic. I actually turn into a very competent, responsible person when I’m overseas and thrust into the role of dealing with other people’s problems. I’ve decided I’m not manager material – I hate other people’s problems. I should be an executive.
Alright, I’m typed out. Perhaps an update from Dulles will follow. Time now for some Solitaire.
Adieu,
GM
It’s been a long time. I apologize for neglecting you.
Necessity drives this reunion. We find ourselves back in the Kuwait airport, and I am horribly, horribly bored, and more than a little exhausted. Since Wi-Fi costs money, and the only way to purchase it is using a mobile phone that I don’t have, I am typing this in Word for now. Sitting in a Starbucks with an orange juice and some green tea, blogging is the natural thing to do. They Asian fellow across from me has his Mac out, and is typing away while he smokes, but I suspect he has better things to do than write a blog. Actually, I just saw his screen and he appears to be IMing and doing video chat with some friends – real friends, as opposed to my imaginary readers. (I don’t mean to bash my readers, but it’s been so long you may have found something else to do.)
So the Kuwait airport is a shopping mecca, as is the rest of Kuwait. Since the Kuwaiti population doesn’t work – they all have government jobs – they turn to consumption to pass the time. Just today I was almost run down by a Porsche, a Hummer, a Mercedes, and some type of classic car. You see, they also don’t respect traffic laws, or maybe they just don’t have traffic laws. I’m not sure. Anyway, being a pedestrian is dangerous work, and I can’t help but feel poor when I walk around like one of the ex-patriot workers who do all the manual labor here. I don’t think actual Kuwaitis do much walking. A Bahraini girl I met last night described Kuwaitis as “arrogant.”
Today I played the tourist again and went to visit Kuwait’s big observation tower. It’s like the Space Needle, but rounder. I first had lunch on the café level. I was told it rotated, but it didn’t appear to be. In fact, the view was obscured by the filthy windows. To be fair, it’s hard keeping anything clean in this region because of all the dust, but they should allot for that when they construct glass observation towers. Anyway, I was midway through lunch – a disappointing, but not entirely bad pizza, plus a fruit milkshake – when a team of men dangling from ropes suddenly flew over the edge of the window overhang! They looked like ninjas, and they started doing flips and things. I thought it was the window washers, but it turned out to be counter-terrorism police doing a drill. I asked why they would practice jumping off a big tower, but I suppose it’s a target as much as anything. The police seemed to be having fun.
During this show, I met two women of unknown origin. One was Asian, one was black, and both lived in Saudi Arabia, although I feel like the Asian one was from Australia. They’d come to Kuwait on a brief vacation and wanted tourist recommendations. I told them to visit the old souk, where I bought Drew that nice loofah last time, and they thought that was a good idea. Anyway, it’s the only place I know. They mentioned a “VIP” movie theater where the chairs massage you, so that also sounded nice.
I stayed in a very nice Courtyard Marriott. It was nicer than most regular Marriotts in the United States, not that most Marriotts are very nice. I always find their linens abrasive and the furniture cheap. But this one was nice. On the way to the airport tonight my Indian driver told me it was nice because Middle Easterners are rich and demand bellboys and concierges and things. He basically implied that Middle Easterners are spoiled, stuck-up wastes of life, and I’m inclined to agree. I don’t think it’s a healthy culture to grow up in, although of course I’m generalizing. I do enjoy staying in hotels here, though. They always have delicious breakfast buffets with fresh juices and fruit, and an admirable pastry selection. Also, they typically have nice cars to shuttle you to the airport, and tonight was no exception.
As I said, I’m sitting in a Starbucks now. It’s my second of the day. Whereas I was excited to see the first one, I was resigned to sit in this one. I came to the airport early hoping to check in and go hang in the departure lounge (I’ve decided I’m upgrading), but check-in doesn’t begin for another hour and a half. I’ve already consumed so much that I really don’t want anything more, but that’s why I’m sticking to light, hydrating liquids. Across the way, though, I see a Pizza Express, and I really love Pizza Express. It’s a British pizza chain with just delicious food. Megan and I went to one in Holland Park, or at least we tried. It’s also the first restaurant I ate at in Manchester, so many years ago. It has a special place in my heart, so once I ditch my bags tonight I may go eat there just for kicks. The alternative would be to go sunglasses shopping, and I feel pizza would be much cheaper, and about as valuable in the long-run. They do have really nice sunglasses here, though. My current favorite pair came from Kuwait.
There are a number of Americans wandering around. It is comforting that none of them seem to know what is going on either. This airport is chaotic -- lots of languages, unclear procedures, and teams of little Southeast Asian men trying to carry your bags for money. For all that, I am finally comfortable navigating this place.
My last day in Baghdad was pleasant enough. I stayed up late the night before watching the last episode of Rome (what a good show!) and reading the last book of Twilight. Unfortunately, with only about 80 pages left in the book, I decided to ship it home. It was just too big of a volume to justify going in a carry-on. Instead I’m reading Abundance, the story of Marie Antoinette, and I have some magazines. If it gets super dull, I’ll watch some of The Tudors, Season II. Megan will recall we watched The Tudors, Season I, in Argentina. It’s been a long time and I have some catching up to do. The bootleg DVD shops in Baghdad sell all these great shows for so cheap! And we’re allowed to ship them home. I don’t know how the military justifies that, but I’m all for it. Rome was a great show!
So my last day, I very leisurely slept in, did some cleaning, did some packing, got some lunch, picked up laundry, and then ran to the post office with one minute to spare. All my considerable loot from the last month is being shipped back home, except, Mom, for your Tupperware container. I’m afraid that was abandoned. I can buy you a new one if you like. Half my office was out, so goodbyes were brief, but I won’t really miss them. I liked them and all, but I won’t miss them. I think I’m over them already. What a tedious job. It’s a really interesting concept, and valuable I think, but actually doing it from day to day was wearing me out fast. Instead I’m off to the great unknown in the DC headquarters! Business development is probably in my future, and I have very little interest in it. Ivan needs to kick into gear and find me a real job! What a fool I was to leave the Pentagon (again)!
DC will hopefully still be snow-covered when I arrive. Well, undoubtedly it will be snow-covered. I just hope it’s clean snow. I’m already anticipating a difficult time getting home from the airport, by which I mean, I don’t know if cabs are even running, and I have way too much luggage to go hoofing through the snow. I also have a flight to Boston booked for some time tomorrow out of BWI. Chances of that happening: slim to none. My reason was to surprise my friends at their Vermont ski trip, but now it sounds like most aren’t going to Vermont because they’re trapped in DC, just like I will be. Best $315 I ever spent. See, I bought TWO tickets to Boston. The first was a great deal -- $200 roundtrip – but I figured out only seconds after I clicked purchase that my return flight was for March 15, not February 15. So then I bought a one-way ticket for Feb. 15 so I could come home to DC. And now it appears I won’t even be going up there. Had I anticipated all this, I would’ve probably stayed in Baghdad another few days and made extra money instead of spending it on wasted airline tickets out of Baltimore.
I can’t stress enough how happy I am to leave that team in Baghdad. “What a bunch of whiners!” I whine to you, loyal readers. That Luis has a bad attitude and is a sub-standard manager, not that he had a great team to work with: smart people, but questionable work ethic. I actually turn into a very competent, responsible person when I’m overseas and thrust into the role of dealing with other people’s problems. I’ve decided I’m not manager material – I hate other people’s problems. I should be an executive.
Alright, I’m typed out. Perhaps an update from Dulles will follow. Time now for some Solitaire.
Adieu,
GM
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
