Day 1.5 is down and I'm still getting settled in with badges, desk, computer, bearings, and things like that, but it's interesting. Expectations are quite high for Rendon's ability to deliver quality analysis to impress the commander and help the staff, but I think we'll do good by them. The only real problem is that they might give us too much credit for being able to track internal Libyan media and social network activity when they themselves can't. I just don't think it's anything we have reliable access to, but we'll try. Yesterday was my first day in the office, and quite stressful given I had to keep absorbing requirements without much knowledge about whether we could do anything about them. Interesting crew on the PA staff, though, and generally very friendly. It's highly international, with lots of Canadians.
Naples itself is bizarre. Parts are beautiful, and from the base it's quite pretty, but the streets on the outside are trashed -- literally there are large piles of trash every couple hundred of yards. We're nearby Capri, Pompeii, and the Amalfi Coast, though, so nice stuff is within reach. And so far the food has been excellent.
0630 on Friday, 5/6. Time to start day 2.5!
Happy birthday, one day late, Katie!
Thursday, May 5, 2011
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
In Which Scott Has the Surprising News Clarified, Just In Case
Dear Scott,
I am home! Surprise!
Having nothing for me to do in Iraq after misleading me into going out there, I am now home in DC at my company's Crystal City office where on my first day I'm not sure they know I exist.
This place feels like the Twilight Zone. It's very quiet. A few people have said hello, but I don't think anyone is going to give me any work. I realize now that I could've stayed in Iraq indefinitely and not done anything, but still gotten paid. I think instead that is what will now happen here in DC. I will come into work, do nothing, and be paid. Occasionally I will wander down to the Au Bon Pain in the Crystal City underground and get a latte and perhaps a cinnamon scone. All the weight I lost in Iraq I will quickly regain. This is what I predict.
Anyway, in the interest of getting this posted, that is all for now.
Let's hit the gym!
I am home! Surprise!
Having nothing for me to do in Iraq after misleading me into going out there, I am now home in DC at my company's Crystal City office where on my first day I'm not sure they know I exist.
This place feels like the Twilight Zone. It's very quiet. A few people have said hello, but I don't think anyone is going to give me any work. I realize now that I could've stayed in Iraq indefinitely and not done anything, but still gotten paid. I think instead that is what will now happen here in DC. I will come into work, do nothing, and be paid. Occasionally I will wander down to the Au Bon Pain in the Crystal City underground and get a latte and perhaps a cinnamon scone. All the weight I lost in Iraq I will quickly regain. This is what I predict.
Anyway, in the interest of getting this posted, that is all for now.
Let's hit the gym!
In Which Scott Learns of Surprising News
Dear Blog,
It’s been a long time. I apologize for neglecting you.
Necessity drives this reunion. We find ourselves back in the Kuwait airport, and I am horribly, horribly bored, and more than a little exhausted. Since Wi-Fi costs money, and the only way to purchase it is using a mobile phone that I don’t have, I am typing this in Word for now. Sitting in a Starbucks with an orange juice and some green tea, blogging is the natural thing to do. They Asian fellow across from me has his Mac out, and is typing away while he smokes, but I suspect he has better things to do than write a blog. Actually, I just saw his screen and he appears to be IMing and doing video chat with some friends – real friends, as opposed to my imaginary readers. (I don’t mean to bash my readers, but it’s been so long you may have found something else to do.)
So the Kuwait airport is a shopping mecca, as is the rest of Kuwait. Since the Kuwaiti population doesn’t work – they all have government jobs – they turn to consumption to pass the time. Just today I was almost run down by a Porsche, a Hummer, a Mercedes, and some type of classic car. You see, they also don’t respect traffic laws, or maybe they just don’t have traffic laws. I’m not sure. Anyway, being a pedestrian is dangerous work, and I can’t help but feel poor when I walk around like one of the ex-patriot workers who do all the manual labor here. I don’t think actual Kuwaitis do much walking. A Bahraini girl I met last night described Kuwaitis as “arrogant.”
Today I played the tourist again and went to visit Kuwait’s big observation tower. It’s like the Space Needle, but rounder. I first had lunch on the café level. I was told it rotated, but it didn’t appear to be. In fact, the view was obscured by the filthy windows. To be fair, it’s hard keeping anything clean in this region because of all the dust, but they should allot for that when they construct glass observation towers. Anyway, I was midway through lunch – a disappointing, but not entirely bad pizza, plus a fruit milkshake – when a team of men dangling from ropes suddenly flew over the edge of the window overhang! They looked like ninjas, and they started doing flips and things. I thought it was the window washers, but it turned out to be counter-terrorism police doing a drill. I asked why they would practice jumping off a big tower, but I suppose it’s a target as much as anything. The police seemed to be having fun.
During this show, I met two women of unknown origin. One was Asian, one was black, and both lived in Saudi Arabia, although I feel like the Asian one was from Australia. They’d come to Kuwait on a brief vacation and wanted tourist recommendations. I told them to visit the old souk, where I bought Drew that nice loofah last time, and they thought that was a good idea. Anyway, it’s the only place I know. They mentioned a “VIP” movie theater where the chairs massage you, so that also sounded nice.
I stayed in a very nice Courtyard Marriott. It was nicer than most regular Marriotts in the United States, not that most Marriotts are very nice. I always find their linens abrasive and the furniture cheap. But this one was nice. On the way to the airport tonight my Indian driver told me it was nice because Middle Easterners are rich and demand bellboys and concierges and things. He basically implied that Middle Easterners are spoiled, stuck-up wastes of life, and I’m inclined to agree. I don’t think it’s a healthy culture to grow up in, although of course I’m generalizing. I do enjoy staying in hotels here, though. They always have delicious breakfast buffets with fresh juices and fruit, and an admirable pastry selection. Also, they typically have nice cars to shuttle you to the airport, and tonight was no exception.
As I said, I’m sitting in a Starbucks now. It’s my second of the day. Whereas I was excited to see the first one, I was resigned to sit in this one. I came to the airport early hoping to check in and go hang in the departure lounge (I’ve decided I’m upgrading), but check-in doesn’t begin for another hour and a half. I’ve already consumed so much that I really don’t want anything more, but that’s why I’m sticking to light, hydrating liquids. Across the way, though, I see a Pizza Express, and I really love Pizza Express. It’s a British pizza chain with just delicious food. Megan and I went to one in Holland Park, or at least we tried. It’s also the first restaurant I ate at in Manchester, so many years ago. It has a special place in my heart, so once I ditch my bags tonight I may go eat there just for kicks. The alternative would be to go sunglasses shopping, and I feel pizza would be much cheaper, and about as valuable in the long-run. They do have really nice sunglasses here, though. My current favorite pair came from Kuwait.
There are a number of Americans wandering around. It is comforting that none of them seem to know what is going on either. This airport is chaotic -- lots of languages, unclear procedures, and teams of little Southeast Asian men trying to carry your bags for money. For all that, I am finally comfortable navigating this place.
My last day in Baghdad was pleasant enough. I stayed up late the night before watching the last episode of Rome (what a good show!) and reading the last book of Twilight. Unfortunately, with only about 80 pages left in the book, I decided to ship it home. It was just too big of a volume to justify going in a carry-on. Instead I’m reading Abundance, the story of Marie Antoinette, and I have some magazines. If it gets super dull, I’ll watch some of The Tudors, Season II. Megan will recall we watched The Tudors, Season I, in Argentina. It’s been a long time and I have some catching up to do. The bootleg DVD shops in Baghdad sell all these great shows for so cheap! And we’re allowed to ship them home. I don’t know how the military justifies that, but I’m all for it. Rome was a great show!
So my last day, I very leisurely slept in, did some cleaning, did some packing, got some lunch, picked up laundry, and then ran to the post office with one minute to spare. All my considerable loot from the last month is being shipped back home, except, Mom, for your Tupperware container. I’m afraid that was abandoned. I can buy you a new one if you like. Half my office was out, so goodbyes were brief, but I won’t really miss them. I liked them and all, but I won’t miss them. I think I’m over them already. What a tedious job. It’s a really interesting concept, and valuable I think, but actually doing it from day to day was wearing me out fast. Instead I’m off to the great unknown in the DC headquarters! Business development is probably in my future, and I have very little interest in it. Ivan needs to kick into gear and find me a real job! What a fool I was to leave the Pentagon (again)!
DC will hopefully still be snow-covered when I arrive. Well, undoubtedly it will be snow-covered. I just hope it’s clean snow. I’m already anticipating a difficult time getting home from the airport, by which I mean, I don’t know if cabs are even running, and I have way too much luggage to go hoofing through the snow. I also have a flight to Boston booked for some time tomorrow out of BWI. Chances of that happening: slim to none. My reason was to surprise my friends at their Vermont ski trip, but now it sounds like most aren’t going to Vermont because they’re trapped in DC, just like I will be. Best $315 I ever spent. See, I bought TWO tickets to Boston. The first was a great deal -- $200 roundtrip – but I figured out only seconds after I clicked purchase that my return flight was for March 15, not February 15. So then I bought a one-way ticket for Feb. 15 so I could come home to DC. And now it appears I won’t even be going up there. Had I anticipated all this, I would’ve probably stayed in Baghdad another few days and made extra money instead of spending it on wasted airline tickets out of Baltimore.
I can’t stress enough how happy I am to leave that team in Baghdad. “What a bunch of whiners!” I whine to you, loyal readers. That Luis has a bad attitude and is a sub-standard manager, not that he had a great team to work with: smart people, but questionable work ethic. I actually turn into a very competent, responsible person when I’m overseas and thrust into the role of dealing with other people’s problems. I’ve decided I’m not manager material – I hate other people’s problems. I should be an executive.
Alright, I’m typed out. Perhaps an update from Dulles will follow. Time now for some Solitaire.
Adieu,
GM
It’s been a long time. I apologize for neglecting you.
Necessity drives this reunion. We find ourselves back in the Kuwait airport, and I am horribly, horribly bored, and more than a little exhausted. Since Wi-Fi costs money, and the only way to purchase it is using a mobile phone that I don’t have, I am typing this in Word for now. Sitting in a Starbucks with an orange juice and some green tea, blogging is the natural thing to do. They Asian fellow across from me has his Mac out, and is typing away while he smokes, but I suspect he has better things to do than write a blog. Actually, I just saw his screen and he appears to be IMing and doing video chat with some friends – real friends, as opposed to my imaginary readers. (I don’t mean to bash my readers, but it’s been so long you may have found something else to do.)
So the Kuwait airport is a shopping mecca, as is the rest of Kuwait. Since the Kuwaiti population doesn’t work – they all have government jobs – they turn to consumption to pass the time. Just today I was almost run down by a Porsche, a Hummer, a Mercedes, and some type of classic car. You see, they also don’t respect traffic laws, or maybe they just don’t have traffic laws. I’m not sure. Anyway, being a pedestrian is dangerous work, and I can’t help but feel poor when I walk around like one of the ex-patriot workers who do all the manual labor here. I don’t think actual Kuwaitis do much walking. A Bahraini girl I met last night described Kuwaitis as “arrogant.”
Today I played the tourist again and went to visit Kuwait’s big observation tower. It’s like the Space Needle, but rounder. I first had lunch on the café level. I was told it rotated, but it didn’t appear to be. In fact, the view was obscured by the filthy windows. To be fair, it’s hard keeping anything clean in this region because of all the dust, but they should allot for that when they construct glass observation towers. Anyway, I was midway through lunch – a disappointing, but not entirely bad pizza, plus a fruit milkshake – when a team of men dangling from ropes suddenly flew over the edge of the window overhang! They looked like ninjas, and they started doing flips and things. I thought it was the window washers, but it turned out to be counter-terrorism police doing a drill. I asked why they would practice jumping off a big tower, but I suppose it’s a target as much as anything. The police seemed to be having fun.
During this show, I met two women of unknown origin. One was Asian, one was black, and both lived in Saudi Arabia, although I feel like the Asian one was from Australia. They’d come to Kuwait on a brief vacation and wanted tourist recommendations. I told them to visit the old souk, where I bought Drew that nice loofah last time, and they thought that was a good idea. Anyway, it’s the only place I know. They mentioned a “VIP” movie theater where the chairs massage you, so that also sounded nice.
I stayed in a very nice Courtyard Marriott. It was nicer than most regular Marriotts in the United States, not that most Marriotts are very nice. I always find their linens abrasive and the furniture cheap. But this one was nice. On the way to the airport tonight my Indian driver told me it was nice because Middle Easterners are rich and demand bellboys and concierges and things. He basically implied that Middle Easterners are spoiled, stuck-up wastes of life, and I’m inclined to agree. I don’t think it’s a healthy culture to grow up in, although of course I’m generalizing. I do enjoy staying in hotels here, though. They always have delicious breakfast buffets with fresh juices and fruit, and an admirable pastry selection. Also, they typically have nice cars to shuttle you to the airport, and tonight was no exception.
As I said, I’m sitting in a Starbucks now. It’s my second of the day. Whereas I was excited to see the first one, I was resigned to sit in this one. I came to the airport early hoping to check in and go hang in the departure lounge (I’ve decided I’m upgrading), but check-in doesn’t begin for another hour and a half. I’ve already consumed so much that I really don’t want anything more, but that’s why I’m sticking to light, hydrating liquids. Across the way, though, I see a Pizza Express, and I really love Pizza Express. It’s a British pizza chain with just delicious food. Megan and I went to one in Holland Park, or at least we tried. It’s also the first restaurant I ate at in Manchester, so many years ago. It has a special place in my heart, so once I ditch my bags tonight I may go eat there just for kicks. The alternative would be to go sunglasses shopping, and I feel pizza would be much cheaper, and about as valuable in the long-run. They do have really nice sunglasses here, though. My current favorite pair came from Kuwait.
There are a number of Americans wandering around. It is comforting that none of them seem to know what is going on either. This airport is chaotic -- lots of languages, unclear procedures, and teams of little Southeast Asian men trying to carry your bags for money. For all that, I am finally comfortable navigating this place.
My last day in Baghdad was pleasant enough. I stayed up late the night before watching the last episode of Rome (what a good show!) and reading the last book of Twilight. Unfortunately, with only about 80 pages left in the book, I decided to ship it home. It was just too big of a volume to justify going in a carry-on. Instead I’m reading Abundance, the story of Marie Antoinette, and I have some magazines. If it gets super dull, I’ll watch some of The Tudors, Season II. Megan will recall we watched The Tudors, Season I, in Argentina. It’s been a long time and I have some catching up to do. The bootleg DVD shops in Baghdad sell all these great shows for so cheap! And we’re allowed to ship them home. I don’t know how the military justifies that, but I’m all for it. Rome was a great show!
So my last day, I very leisurely slept in, did some cleaning, did some packing, got some lunch, picked up laundry, and then ran to the post office with one minute to spare. All my considerable loot from the last month is being shipped back home, except, Mom, for your Tupperware container. I’m afraid that was abandoned. I can buy you a new one if you like. Half my office was out, so goodbyes were brief, but I won’t really miss them. I liked them and all, but I won’t miss them. I think I’m over them already. What a tedious job. It’s a really interesting concept, and valuable I think, but actually doing it from day to day was wearing me out fast. Instead I’m off to the great unknown in the DC headquarters! Business development is probably in my future, and I have very little interest in it. Ivan needs to kick into gear and find me a real job! What a fool I was to leave the Pentagon (again)!
DC will hopefully still be snow-covered when I arrive. Well, undoubtedly it will be snow-covered. I just hope it’s clean snow. I’m already anticipating a difficult time getting home from the airport, by which I mean, I don’t know if cabs are even running, and I have way too much luggage to go hoofing through the snow. I also have a flight to Boston booked for some time tomorrow out of BWI. Chances of that happening: slim to none. My reason was to surprise my friends at their Vermont ski trip, but now it sounds like most aren’t going to Vermont because they’re trapped in DC, just like I will be. Best $315 I ever spent. See, I bought TWO tickets to Boston. The first was a great deal -- $200 roundtrip – but I figured out only seconds after I clicked purchase that my return flight was for March 15, not February 15. So then I bought a one-way ticket for Feb. 15 so I could come home to DC. And now it appears I won’t even be going up there. Had I anticipated all this, I would’ve probably stayed in Baghdad another few days and made extra money instead of spending it on wasted airline tickets out of Baltimore.
I can’t stress enough how happy I am to leave that team in Baghdad. “What a bunch of whiners!” I whine to you, loyal readers. That Luis has a bad attitude and is a sub-standard manager, not that he had a great team to work with: smart people, but questionable work ethic. I actually turn into a very competent, responsible person when I’m overseas and thrust into the role of dealing with other people’s problems. I’ve decided I’m not manager material – I hate other people’s problems. I should be an executive.
Alright, I’m typed out. Perhaps an update from Dulles will follow. Time now for some Solitaire.
Adieu,
GM
Friday, January 22, 2010
(sigh)
Dear Blog,
No Haiti. The military decided to be cheap and stick to uniformed personnel to staff all their offices. I don't care for that decision, but what can you do?
This leaves me with some thinking to do about next steps... Any suggestions? Perhaps it's time to pursue bartending.
Sincerely,
The Author
No Haiti. The military decided to be cheap and stick to uniformed personnel to staff all their offices. I don't care for that decision, but what can you do?
This leaves me with some thinking to do about next steps... Any suggestions? Perhaps it's time to pursue bartending.
Sincerely,
The Author
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
In Which Tim Makes Up for Lost Time
Greetings Blog Reader,
So much has happened since we last talked. Where to begin? Let's start with the most recent, I suppose.
Normally I wouldn't mention this to anyone besides Ivan, but it's funny. The toilet paper in the bathroom stalls here is assembled by blind people in Nebraska. Or maybe it's North Dakota, but either way, the more people use the toilet, the more they support the blind. I think it's a nice, viable alternative to other forms of charitable giving.
Next up, yesterday I saw a child! There was a little girl with her parents in the PX (a store on base). She couldn't have been older than 8. You don't see children here. I can't imagine what they were doing. They all looked African, which is even more bizarre. It was a nice surprise though. Things must be going well if there are children running around.
Considering how little happens here, I'm embarrassed to say I almost forgot this, but last night the team went out to dinner at a new Iraqi restaurant on base. They built this little restaurant compound in one corner of the base, and there is a big grassy outdoor seating area, a Turkish coffeehouse, a Turkish restaurant, Chinese restaurant, and soon an Italian place will open. They have hookahs, and very good baklava. It was really good, plus it's the first time I'd hung out with the Iraqi-American guys on the team. They're a lot of fun. They all know each other in random ways. Very interesting stories too abut what they've done in life before this: one was an actor, one an engineer, one a car salesman, two worked at State... all sorts of stuff. Anyway, the occasion was a going-away for our two military staff. They leave Sunday. The replacement arrives sometime around 4AM tonight, so hopefully he's as easy to get along with.
So the big news (for anyone who cares) is that the president of my company got fired unexpectedly last week. No one has said why, but they're going through a re-org now. He was the guy I reported to, but now I report to a guy Ed who happens to be out here at the moment. He's going to be the replacement president until they can recruit somebody permanent. They also hired a VP named Bob Bevelacqua. I've never met him, but apparently he was one of the retired military analysts that the Pentagon used to brief so that they could talk intelligently on the cable news shows. That was Roxie's program at the Pentagon, so small world... Anyway, since Paul (the old president) had been the strategist, now no one knows what I'm doing next. I should probably care more, but I enjoy the thought of leaving here. I mean I like it, but I'd prefer to do repeated, very brief stints. Maybe that's possible. Of course the alternative is going to Haiti. I mentioned that to some people. To the others... surprise! If it happens. If SOUTHCOM gets their butts in motion then it will happen in about 2 weeks. If not, then we'll see what Leonie has in mind. And if neither of those come through, there is a Homeland Security gig that is now being announced by Feb 1. If by some odd chance nothing comes through, Ian will have a squatter on his hands.
The only other thing I remember wanting to talk about was the fog on the lake, but that can wait. I'm tired.
Well, loyal reader, thank you for your time.
So much has happened since we last talked. Where to begin? Let's start with the most recent, I suppose.
Normally I wouldn't mention this to anyone besides Ivan, but it's funny. The toilet paper in the bathroom stalls here is assembled by blind people in Nebraska. Or maybe it's North Dakota, but either way, the more people use the toilet, the more they support the blind. I think it's a nice, viable alternative to other forms of charitable giving.
Next up, yesterday I saw a child! There was a little girl with her parents in the PX (a store on base). She couldn't have been older than 8. You don't see children here. I can't imagine what they were doing. They all looked African, which is even more bizarre. It was a nice surprise though. Things must be going well if there are children running around.
Considering how little happens here, I'm embarrassed to say I almost forgot this, but last night the team went out to dinner at a new Iraqi restaurant on base. They built this little restaurant compound in one corner of the base, and there is a big grassy outdoor seating area, a Turkish coffeehouse, a Turkish restaurant, Chinese restaurant, and soon an Italian place will open. They have hookahs, and very good baklava. It was really good, plus it's the first time I'd hung out with the Iraqi-American guys on the team. They're a lot of fun. They all know each other in random ways. Very interesting stories too abut what they've done in life before this: one was an actor, one an engineer, one a car salesman, two worked at State... all sorts of stuff. Anyway, the occasion was a going-away for our two military staff. They leave Sunday. The replacement arrives sometime around 4AM tonight, so hopefully he's as easy to get along with.
So the big news (for anyone who cares) is that the president of my company got fired unexpectedly last week. No one has said why, but they're going through a re-org now. He was the guy I reported to, but now I report to a guy Ed who happens to be out here at the moment. He's going to be the replacement president until they can recruit somebody permanent. They also hired a VP named Bob Bevelacqua. I've never met him, but apparently he was one of the retired military analysts that the Pentagon used to brief so that they could talk intelligently on the cable news shows. That was Roxie's program at the Pentagon, so small world... Anyway, since Paul (the old president) had been the strategist, now no one knows what I'm doing next. I should probably care more, but I enjoy the thought of leaving here. I mean I like it, but I'd prefer to do repeated, very brief stints. Maybe that's possible. Of course the alternative is going to Haiti. I mentioned that to some people. To the others... surprise! If it happens. If SOUTHCOM gets their butts in motion then it will happen in about 2 weeks. If not, then we'll see what Leonie has in mind. And if neither of those come through, there is a Homeland Security gig that is now being announced by Feb 1. If by some odd chance nothing comes through, Ian will have a squatter on his hands.
The only other thing I remember wanting to talk about was the fog on the lake, but that can wait. I'm tired.
Well, loyal reader, thank you for your time.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Baghdad: City of Dust
Today marks my first sandstorm of the year. We woke to a grey, windy day and I was very afraid of rain. (Rain here leads to days of gross mud.) Instead, the wind continued and it has gotten very, very dusty. You see clouds of dust blowing around, meaning you breath in a lot more dust that you don't see. This is some comfort to those of us who spend 98% of the day indoors, jealous of people who are outside.
Tomorrow we will see if the dust keeps up or if it's sunny and warm again. Either way, it beats -1!
Tomorrow we will see if the dust keeps up or if it's sunny and warm again. Either way, it beats -1!
Monday, January 11, 2010
The Ablution Unit
Many things over here have interesting names, typically shortened to an acronym, and our showers are no exception. The trailer I walk to every morning to clean myself and wake up is endearingly called an "Ablution Unit."
Unlike some of the other poorly named things -- the DFAC (Dining Facility) comes to mind -- the ablution unit isn't prominently labeled as such. On the door to the trailer it just says "Male Shower." But if you look closely at the signs indoors, they refer to it in many places as the ablution unit, and warn you away from such unpleasantries such as electrical shocks, sewage spills, and water cut-offs.
The name makes me happy because you don't often hear "ablution" used. No one says anymore, "I'm performing my ablutions." I don't know how the military heard of it.
Oh well.
In other news, Sarah Palin is joining FOX!
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_palin_fox_news
Anyone feel like they need to go perform some mental ablutions now?
This post has been dedicated to Ian.
Unlike some of the other poorly named things -- the DFAC (Dining Facility) comes to mind -- the ablution unit isn't prominently labeled as such. On the door to the trailer it just says "Male Shower." But if you look closely at the signs indoors, they refer to it in many places as the ablution unit, and warn you away from such unpleasantries such as electrical shocks, sewage spills, and water cut-offs.
The name makes me happy because you don't often hear "ablution" used. No one says anymore, "I'm performing my ablutions." I don't know how the military heard of it.
Oh well.
In other news, Sarah Palin is joining FOX!
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_palin_fox_news
Anyone feel like they need to go perform some mental ablutions now?
This post has been dedicated to Ian.
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