Dear Blog,
No Haiti. The military decided to be cheap and stick to uniformed personnel to staff all their offices. I don't care for that decision, but what can you do?
This leaves me with some thinking to do about next steps... Any suggestions? Perhaps it's time to pursue bartending.
Sincerely,
The Author
Friday, January 22, 2010
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
In Which Tim Makes Up for Lost Time
Greetings Blog Reader,
So much has happened since we last talked. Where to begin? Let's start with the most recent, I suppose.
Normally I wouldn't mention this to anyone besides Ivan, but it's funny. The toilet paper in the bathroom stalls here is assembled by blind people in Nebraska. Or maybe it's North Dakota, but either way, the more people use the toilet, the more they support the blind. I think it's a nice, viable alternative to other forms of charitable giving.
Next up, yesterday I saw a child! There was a little girl with her parents in the PX (a store on base). She couldn't have been older than 8. You don't see children here. I can't imagine what they were doing. They all looked African, which is even more bizarre. It was a nice surprise though. Things must be going well if there are children running around.
Considering how little happens here, I'm embarrassed to say I almost forgot this, but last night the team went out to dinner at a new Iraqi restaurant on base. They built this little restaurant compound in one corner of the base, and there is a big grassy outdoor seating area, a Turkish coffeehouse, a Turkish restaurant, Chinese restaurant, and soon an Italian place will open. They have hookahs, and very good baklava. It was really good, plus it's the first time I'd hung out with the Iraqi-American guys on the team. They're a lot of fun. They all know each other in random ways. Very interesting stories too abut what they've done in life before this: one was an actor, one an engineer, one a car salesman, two worked at State... all sorts of stuff. Anyway, the occasion was a going-away for our two military staff. They leave Sunday. The replacement arrives sometime around 4AM tonight, so hopefully he's as easy to get along with.
So the big news (for anyone who cares) is that the president of my company got fired unexpectedly last week. No one has said why, but they're going through a re-org now. He was the guy I reported to, but now I report to a guy Ed who happens to be out here at the moment. He's going to be the replacement president until they can recruit somebody permanent. They also hired a VP named Bob Bevelacqua. I've never met him, but apparently he was one of the retired military analysts that the Pentagon used to brief so that they could talk intelligently on the cable news shows. That was Roxie's program at the Pentagon, so small world... Anyway, since Paul (the old president) had been the strategist, now no one knows what I'm doing next. I should probably care more, but I enjoy the thought of leaving here. I mean I like it, but I'd prefer to do repeated, very brief stints. Maybe that's possible. Of course the alternative is going to Haiti. I mentioned that to some people. To the others... surprise! If it happens. If SOUTHCOM gets their butts in motion then it will happen in about 2 weeks. If not, then we'll see what Leonie has in mind. And if neither of those come through, there is a Homeland Security gig that is now being announced by Feb 1. If by some odd chance nothing comes through, Ian will have a squatter on his hands.
The only other thing I remember wanting to talk about was the fog on the lake, but that can wait. I'm tired.
Well, loyal reader, thank you for your time.
So much has happened since we last talked. Where to begin? Let's start with the most recent, I suppose.
Normally I wouldn't mention this to anyone besides Ivan, but it's funny. The toilet paper in the bathroom stalls here is assembled by blind people in Nebraska. Or maybe it's North Dakota, but either way, the more people use the toilet, the more they support the blind. I think it's a nice, viable alternative to other forms of charitable giving.
Next up, yesterday I saw a child! There was a little girl with her parents in the PX (a store on base). She couldn't have been older than 8. You don't see children here. I can't imagine what they were doing. They all looked African, which is even more bizarre. It was a nice surprise though. Things must be going well if there are children running around.
Considering how little happens here, I'm embarrassed to say I almost forgot this, but last night the team went out to dinner at a new Iraqi restaurant on base. They built this little restaurant compound in one corner of the base, and there is a big grassy outdoor seating area, a Turkish coffeehouse, a Turkish restaurant, Chinese restaurant, and soon an Italian place will open. They have hookahs, and very good baklava. It was really good, plus it's the first time I'd hung out with the Iraqi-American guys on the team. They're a lot of fun. They all know each other in random ways. Very interesting stories too abut what they've done in life before this: one was an actor, one an engineer, one a car salesman, two worked at State... all sorts of stuff. Anyway, the occasion was a going-away for our two military staff. They leave Sunday. The replacement arrives sometime around 4AM tonight, so hopefully he's as easy to get along with.
So the big news (for anyone who cares) is that the president of my company got fired unexpectedly last week. No one has said why, but they're going through a re-org now. He was the guy I reported to, but now I report to a guy Ed who happens to be out here at the moment. He's going to be the replacement president until they can recruit somebody permanent. They also hired a VP named Bob Bevelacqua. I've never met him, but apparently he was one of the retired military analysts that the Pentagon used to brief so that they could talk intelligently on the cable news shows. That was Roxie's program at the Pentagon, so small world... Anyway, since Paul (the old president) had been the strategist, now no one knows what I'm doing next. I should probably care more, but I enjoy the thought of leaving here. I mean I like it, but I'd prefer to do repeated, very brief stints. Maybe that's possible. Of course the alternative is going to Haiti. I mentioned that to some people. To the others... surprise! If it happens. If SOUTHCOM gets their butts in motion then it will happen in about 2 weeks. If not, then we'll see what Leonie has in mind. And if neither of those come through, there is a Homeland Security gig that is now being announced by Feb 1. If by some odd chance nothing comes through, Ian will have a squatter on his hands.
The only other thing I remember wanting to talk about was the fog on the lake, but that can wait. I'm tired.
Well, loyal reader, thank you for your time.
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Baghdad: City of Dust
Today marks my first sandstorm of the year. We woke to a grey, windy day and I was very afraid of rain. (Rain here leads to days of gross mud.) Instead, the wind continued and it has gotten very, very dusty. You see clouds of dust blowing around, meaning you breath in a lot more dust that you don't see. This is some comfort to those of us who spend 98% of the day indoors, jealous of people who are outside.
Tomorrow we will see if the dust keeps up or if it's sunny and warm again. Either way, it beats -1!
Tomorrow we will see if the dust keeps up or if it's sunny and warm again. Either way, it beats -1!
Monday, January 11, 2010
The Ablution Unit
Many things over here have interesting names, typically shortened to an acronym, and our showers are no exception. The trailer I walk to every morning to clean myself and wake up is endearingly called an "Ablution Unit."
Unlike some of the other poorly named things -- the DFAC (Dining Facility) comes to mind -- the ablution unit isn't prominently labeled as such. On the door to the trailer it just says "Male Shower." But if you look closely at the signs indoors, they refer to it in many places as the ablution unit, and warn you away from such unpleasantries such as electrical shocks, sewage spills, and water cut-offs.
The name makes me happy because you don't often hear "ablution" used. No one says anymore, "I'm performing my ablutions." I don't know how the military heard of it.
Oh well.
In other news, Sarah Palin is joining FOX!
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_palin_fox_news
Anyone feel like they need to go perform some mental ablutions now?
This post has been dedicated to Ian.
Unlike some of the other poorly named things -- the DFAC (Dining Facility) comes to mind -- the ablution unit isn't prominently labeled as such. On the door to the trailer it just says "Male Shower." But if you look closely at the signs indoors, they refer to it in many places as the ablution unit, and warn you away from such unpleasantries such as electrical shocks, sewage spills, and water cut-offs.
The name makes me happy because you don't often hear "ablution" used. No one says anymore, "I'm performing my ablutions." I don't know how the military heard of it.
Oh well.
In other news, Sarah Palin is joining FOX!
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_palin_fox_news
Anyone feel like they need to go perform some mental ablutions now?
This post has been dedicated to Ian.
Protecting the Skies
VROOOOOOOOOOOOM... Pow pow pow pow pow!
That's the sound we're hearing outside today. It's the sound of the Phalanx system being tested. Those are the big guns positioned around the base that shoot down incoming rockets and mortars. They fire about 150 rounds per second, coating the sky with rather large bullets, in an attempt to blow up whatever is coming in before it hits anything. To prevent massive civilian casualties on what would be the termination of the bullets' arc, they explode mid-air after a few seconds. If you see them fire at night it looks like lasers beams going across the sky. Pretty cool. They are very loud, though, if you happen to be standing nearby.
Anyway, that was the big excitement for the afternoon.
In other exciting news (and this may be exciting only to Scott), more and more magazines are working bar codes into their advertisements, and then people can use smart phones to scan them and get more information.
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/11/business/media/11mag.html
And for Ian, here are some things the cafeteria served for lunch today:
Chicken
Mashed potatoes
Chicken wings
Curry
Salad
Rolls
Jello
Soda
Cookies
And finally for Andy, I'm reading a new book.
Happy Monday, everyone!
That's the sound we're hearing outside today. It's the sound of the Phalanx system being tested. Those are the big guns positioned around the base that shoot down incoming rockets and mortars. They fire about 150 rounds per second, coating the sky with rather large bullets, in an attempt to blow up whatever is coming in before it hits anything. To prevent massive civilian casualties on what would be the termination of the bullets' arc, they explode mid-air after a few seconds. If you see them fire at night it looks like lasers beams going across the sky. Pretty cool. They are very loud, though, if you happen to be standing nearby.
Anyway, that was the big excitement for the afternoon.
In other exciting news (and this may be exciting only to Scott), more and more magazines are working bar codes into their advertisements, and then people can use smart phones to scan them and get more information.
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/11/business/media/11mag.html
And for Ian, here are some things the cafeteria served for lunch today:
Chicken
Mashed potatoes
Chicken wings
Curry
Salad
Rolls
Jello
Soda
Cookies
And finally for Andy, I'm reading a new book.
Happy Monday, everyone!
Baghdad Sun
It's January 11 and 70 degrees outside. This is not the chilly Baghdad winter I remember. Amen to that. My lumberjack flannel seems slightly out of place considering, but it keeps me warm in the office A/C.
Work is progressing nicely today. After a week of relative scrambling, things are all caught up, I've figured out how this all works, and this week should be leisurely. Next up: ideas on how to improve the program. Our military command turns over in a couple weeks, so it's time to impress the new guys!
And not two minutes ago, thanks to Dave Henning, three packages arrived full of cookies, sheets, and other goodies. I'm going to run out of room in my trailer! Thanks, Dave!
Alright, back to editing. I hope Ivan is appeased for now.
Work is progressing nicely today. After a week of relative scrambling, things are all caught up, I've figured out how this all works, and this week should be leisurely. Next up: ideas on how to improve the program. Our military command turns over in a couple weeks, so it's time to impress the new guys!
And not two minutes ago, thanks to Dave Henning, three packages arrived full of cookies, sheets, and other goodies. I'm going to run out of room in my trailer! Thanks, Dave!
Alright, back to editing. I hope Ivan is appeased for now.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Whoa, Nelly!
Hello loyal blog readers! Time for your latest view into my ego-centric world.
It's been a few days in case you haven't noticed. In that time I've done several things:
1) Sat at a coffee house in the Kuwait airport. There is nothing like that airport to make you feel reflective. This time through, I thought, "Wow, here I am again. Huh." The coffee house is actually very good -- they sprinkle cocoa bean shapes onto the foam with chocolate powder -- but I have sat there before reading my book and drinking hot chocolate, and it was weird, if familiar, sitting there again. Getting on the plane to Baghdad wasn't so difficult at that point, though, since I was mostly just tired. I'm looking forward to seeing the inside of that airport again because some day I'm certain I will get the routine down pat. Hopefully next time I can experience it from the first class lounge.
2) Flew to Baghdad on Gryphon Air. This was an enjoyable experience. Before this was on a prop plane with very, very small seats. This time through it was a jet with nice, big, leather seats. I guess they've been successful flying contractors to and fro. I met two other contractors on their way in, and one guy I've seen around in the cafeteria. He would be the closest thing I've made to a friend here outside of the office, and that is not saying much. I'm also looking forward to the next trip on Gryphon because it means I will be going back to the U.S., and I just enjoy the experience. Oh, for you lunar watchers, there was a nice blue moon visible on the way in. Actually, it was a very red moon, but I'm told the phase made it blue. Now you know.
3) Arrived in Baghdad and met some teammates. Not having any idea who to expect, I waited briefly around the airport until someone yelled my name. Then I met Luis and Gerard, my replacee and our IT guy, and they drove me to my trailer home. Gerard talks a lot. Luis, whose trailer I'm crashing in while he's away, told me when we got home that Gerard is a talker. He has proved correct. Today Gerard must've talked for a good five hours. It's a good thing, though. Not talking much myself, someone needs to.
4) Explored my trailer. It is at least a double-wide, so very big. I shared with Luis for two days until he left, and now it's my own. I have a bed, a big wall locker, a nightstand, chair, shelves, lamp, and a lot of space of my own. He has also fitted the room with a stocked bookshelf, unused TV, unused fridge, and a big rug. Overall it is nice. It is very, very, very far away from the office though, in an area called Pad 11. It's on a side of the base I hadn't explored much before, so not near the palace. It's a 12-15 minute drive to work, and despite having three cars for the team, we need to share. That means we do everything together: Luis (when he is here), Gerard, and Omar (Omar is our editor). I eat every meal with them, and I drive home with them. They are nice, but it could grate not having a lot of flexibility to explore the stuff I like on base, or even stay late at work without the hassle of dropping people off. Or meeting anyone else.
5) Met the rest of the team. They are a group of Iraqi-Americans who are really nice and fun. They are more fun than me. Hopefully they don't think I'm boring. Apparently I'm 50,000x better than the old project manager though, because 90 percent of our conversation thus far has been about what an evil person he was. It's weird. Everyone seems to have really, sincerely hated him. So I'm looking good in comparison! The Army folks we work with transfer out in a few weeks, so it will be interesting to see how their replacements are.
6) Explored the office. It is on the good side of base, but somewhat isolated in a corner so that they can stay low profile. If there was time to leave during the day I would say it's a nice location, but so far I've been behind schedule and stuck more or less inside. When we do leave it's to eat or go to the store, and of course that happens with Gerard and Omar. Good thing I like them. Someday soon I aim to branch out and walk somewhere. It will happen, I just know it.
And that, for now, is all. I'm done tired out. Next up in the self-centered chronicles will be about work and changes on Camp Victory. (We're a thriving community!)
Good night to all!
Love,
Tim
It's been a few days in case you haven't noticed. In that time I've done several things:
1) Sat at a coffee house in the Kuwait airport. There is nothing like that airport to make you feel reflective. This time through, I thought, "Wow, here I am again. Huh." The coffee house is actually very good -- they sprinkle cocoa bean shapes onto the foam with chocolate powder -- but I have sat there before reading my book and drinking hot chocolate, and it was weird, if familiar, sitting there again. Getting on the plane to Baghdad wasn't so difficult at that point, though, since I was mostly just tired. I'm looking forward to seeing the inside of that airport again because some day I'm certain I will get the routine down pat. Hopefully next time I can experience it from the first class lounge.
2) Flew to Baghdad on Gryphon Air. This was an enjoyable experience. Before this was on a prop plane with very, very small seats. This time through it was a jet with nice, big, leather seats. I guess they've been successful flying contractors to and fro. I met two other contractors on their way in, and one guy I've seen around in the cafeteria. He would be the closest thing I've made to a friend here outside of the office, and that is not saying much. I'm also looking forward to the next trip on Gryphon because it means I will be going back to the U.S., and I just enjoy the experience. Oh, for you lunar watchers, there was a nice blue moon visible on the way in. Actually, it was a very red moon, but I'm told the phase made it blue. Now you know.
3) Arrived in Baghdad and met some teammates. Not having any idea who to expect, I waited briefly around the airport until someone yelled my name. Then I met Luis and Gerard, my replacee and our IT guy, and they drove me to my trailer home. Gerard talks a lot. Luis, whose trailer I'm crashing in while he's away, told me when we got home that Gerard is a talker. He has proved correct. Today Gerard must've talked for a good five hours. It's a good thing, though. Not talking much myself, someone needs to.
4) Explored my trailer. It is at least a double-wide, so very big. I shared with Luis for two days until he left, and now it's my own. I have a bed, a big wall locker, a nightstand, chair, shelves, lamp, and a lot of space of my own. He has also fitted the room with a stocked bookshelf, unused TV, unused fridge, and a big rug. Overall it is nice. It is very, very, very far away from the office though, in an area called Pad 11. It's on a side of the base I hadn't explored much before, so not near the palace. It's a 12-15 minute drive to work, and despite having three cars for the team, we need to share. That means we do everything together: Luis (when he is here), Gerard, and Omar (Omar is our editor). I eat every meal with them, and I drive home with them. They are nice, but it could grate not having a lot of flexibility to explore the stuff I like on base, or even stay late at work without the hassle of dropping people off. Or meeting anyone else.
5) Met the rest of the team. They are a group of Iraqi-Americans who are really nice and fun. They are more fun than me. Hopefully they don't think I'm boring. Apparently I'm 50,000x better than the old project manager though, because 90 percent of our conversation thus far has been about what an evil person he was. It's weird. Everyone seems to have really, sincerely hated him. So I'm looking good in comparison! The Army folks we work with transfer out in a few weeks, so it will be interesting to see how their replacements are.
6) Explored the office. It is on the good side of base, but somewhat isolated in a corner so that they can stay low profile. If there was time to leave during the day I would say it's a nice location, but so far I've been behind schedule and stuck more or less inside. When we do leave it's to eat or go to the store, and of course that happens with Gerard and Omar. Good thing I like them. Someday soon I aim to branch out and walk somewhere. It will happen, I just know it.
And that, for now, is all. I'm done tired out. Next up in the self-centered chronicles will be about work and changes on Camp Victory. (We're a thriving community!)
Good night to all!
Love,
Tim
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